Do I Owe Anyone Jack Shit?

I discovered a kind of cool thing on my WordPress app just now…it shows the stats on this here blog back to 1970! Not only are the stats nearly as old as I am, they show me that pretty much nobody is looking at this odd little corner of the internet. As far as I’m […]

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Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder: or, how my fucked-up brain keeps me from doing pretty much anything

It’s been more than two months since I posted here. And I wasn’t exactly posting regularly before that. It sucks, because I really want to write. Words travel through my head and want to spill out of me, but my brain won’t let them.  You see, for some really fucked up reason, I get these […]

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Loving You Less Than Life*

My husband has been my rock for the last six months or so – quietly there, doing what needs to be done, giving me space when I need it, and holding me close when I crave non-child-related human contact. He makes me laugh, sometimes even on my darkest days, and I don’t know what I’d […]

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This shit is hard. 

When you’re dealing with mental illness, which in my case is comprised of things like generalized anxiety disorder, major depressive disorder, obsessive-compulsive personality disorder, and probable PTSD, starting to actually deal with things can feel liberating.  “Oh, yeah,” you think, “I’m getting my shit together. Meds and psychotherapy and self-care and light therapy, I got […]

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I’m a Terrible Friend.

Text: I have this friend. Sort of friend. Still a friend. I don’t know. I’ve known her for nearly 30 years, but haven’t spoken to her for months, certainly not since this depressive episode began last fall. About 18 months ago, this friend had a medical crisis which, another friend and I discovered, was brought […]

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Breaking Wide Open.

Text: I keep trying to write, and the words refuse to come out of my head and land on the paper. I’m beginning to peek my head out of the shell of depression, but the shit that has surface as a result of therapy is right fucking there and refuses to be ignored. I hide, […]

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